dajo42:

dress for the job you want, not the job you have. show up to your day job at mcdonalds in a spacesuit. who the fuck’s gonna stop the mcastronaut

(via userbar)


119,274 notes




back-that-sass-up:

legalmexican:

*Teacher Voice* I’ll wait

image

tHATS THE FACE THATS THE FACE EXACLTY

(via spoopy-bot)


597,571 notes


sarcasticspokesperson:

I think we all know who the real winner of this skeleton war is…
smitty werbenjagermanjensen, he was #1


greetings:

every teen after missing like 300 calls from their mom

(via famousest)


82,069 notes


yyuks:

w0l0w1zard:

fitandhealthyforlifee:

friendlyneighborhoodcurmudgeon:

Two MSU basketball players raped a woman in the dorms then one admitted to it. Their only consequence was that they had to move out of the dorms. This picture is of me and one other woman holding up this banner during Midnight Madness. Two other brave souls had a banner on the other side for a while before some jerk started playing tug or war with them over it. This was taken before we got booed at by 10,000 people and police escorted from the stadium. 

How screwed up are people to boo at this? 

Let’s keep reposting this. Rapists should be charged.

how is sport more important than the lives of women? like honestly baffling

Anonymous asked: you tell crazy stories but has a woman ever tried to kill you ?

jimmbbo:

perfect-melodies-filthy-wubs:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

This one girl accused me of cheating for having female friends (which i wasnt fucking or flirting with but was just cool friends I dont wanna talk to a bunch of niggas all day i need a female perspective on things) she was screaming at me for 20 mins straight

i dont argue back cause im laid back im just like mhmmm mhmmm looking in my phone checking sports scores and on twitter … so at one point she says “was the pussy atleast good my nigga?” i was like “mmhmm that shit was nice and tight”  all of a sudden i heard silence i look up shes like

image

*this is the moment where i knew i fucked up*

just looks at me like that for like 20 seconds “im like bae im just playing.. im just playing…”  she runs to the kitchen… and starts going in the drawers “im like shawty u needa chill”   im like “im just playing”

she pulls something out all i see was the light beam reflect off it

i get a good look i see this in her hand

im in the couch like

she starts running towards me so i open the door step outside then shut the door from the outside and use all my body weight to hold onto the door knob, She used to run track in highschool so i think she gon catch me so im like nah im not even gon run and get stabbed in the spine

she pulling tryna open it lol im in a project type building on the 12th floor man I was standing there for 43 mins shorty aint have an ounce of quit in her. People walking by laughing hearing her screaming at me

some middle aged lady walked by she was like 50 she was like “mmmmhmmm she caught your ass didnt she”

im like “ma’am help my arms tired”

she was like ahaaa nope “call that bitch you was fucking for help”  and walked into her apt

then shorties mom came out the elevator i was like thank god.. she was like oh lord what u do.. i was like “nothingg ma’am she got a knife i swear i did nothing ” her mom was like “kita put the damn knife down im coming in if u stab me imma beat your ass” i feel the pressure get off the door and i make a run for it i see her try to come chase me but her mom blocks her Im sure i coulda beat usain bolt in a race the way i was running

she was really gon stab me, If her moms aint come i woulda still been standing there holding the door to this day

i’ve never re-blogged something so quick in my life. 

I fuckin love tumblr stories

44,060 notes

durkin62:

We still haven’t even gotten past the 19th century yet around here. 
dietcrush:

wow I can’t believe that Texas is nearly as big as the entire continental United States including Texas


63,831 notes


170,534 notes